Last night, at 3am, Matthew vomited; again at 9am and again at 3pm. He has the stomach flu and is his first illness for this season.
At one year birthday, Matthew had a fever. At the 2nd year birthday, it was Ryan’s turn to get sick. At the 3rd birthday at Disney: Matt had a fever at 3am and was fine next day. At the 4th bday at Disney, he vomited and fine the next day and now.
I think it is Ryan's sign to tell me to focus on Matthew. I was planning to go to work but instead we stayed at home: played games, watched TV, cuddled and napped with Matthew. It was nice but broke my heart to hear him said his tummy hurt. Also, I think I saw 3 sets of twin boys of the 2 hours I was out to see the doc....
I was so focused on Matthew today that I couldn’t focus on Ryan as much. I lit a candle for him.
There aren’t tears shed today much because the tears were all dried up since the start of Halloween. The anticipation was much more difficult. Matthew reminded me that I needed to focus on him. Today will be the first day where our time with Ryan is shorter than our time without him. It breaks our hearts….
My dear friend wrote this and really hit the spot:
“Happy birthday Ryan…thinking of you today and what a handsome young man you would be at the age of 5! I know you would you be as sweet as your brother with love and laughter in your eyes. We all miss you and love you and cherish the short time you were here. I believe you are with us each day though, keeping us safe. Happy birthday big boy!”
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